Redacted 39th Page of Affidavit Found - Ted Holland, Humor Times

Dispatches from SNN (Slobovian News Network)

Slobovian Secret Service operative Redd Hotte has uncovered a mysterious 39th page of the newly-released redacted DOJ affidavit.

News outlets around the world were issued a 38-page Department of Justice redacted affidavit regarding the recent FBI raid on former president Donald Trump’s Florida Estate.

redacted Mar-a-Lago — Photo by Peter Stevens, flickr.com.

However, SNN has received evidence that there was a 39th page of the Slobovian Secret Service operative Redd Hotte has uncovered a mysterious 39th page of the newly-released DOJ affidavit, labeled “Super Top Secret,” which was not released.

Slobovian Secret Service agent Redd Hotte obtained the 39th page from one of her confidential informants in the White House and passed it on to SNN underground reporter Rigor Mortis.

SNN feels that as the world’s oldest news source, it is our civic duty to release the page (which was also redacted) to the public.

Super Top Secret

████ ████████ ███████ DOJ, FBI, CIA, WWE ████████ ██████████. ██████████ covert operation ████████████ Hillary Clinton’s left buttox █████████. ██████████ obstruction of justice ██████ 7 buckets of chicken livers ████████████ ████████████ mambo Italiano █████ evidence of obstruction. █████████ people who had sex with monkeys on January 6 ██████████████ protect the integrity of ████████ ████████ Donald Trump’s KFC platinum card.

██████████ █████████ █████████████ gitchy goomie ██████████. █████████ planet Zardoc ████ ██████████ ███████████ confidential ███████. █████████ Debbie Does Dallas ████████████ Ookey Ook ██████ █████ █████████ █████ ██████ top secret ███████ ████████. Let’s twist again like we did last summer ████████████ █████████████. Joe Biden, Abdullah the Butcher, Mother Teresa ████████ █████████ ██ ██████████████ kiss my ass ██████ ████████ ██████ █████████ ██████ lard ███.

███████████ ███████████ November 8,2027 ███████ ██████████. ███████ ████ ██████ ███████ Buck Rogers ████████████████ Fox News Channel ████ ████ Wang Wang Blues ████████████ █████████ get into Nancy Pelosi’s █████ █████ ██████. ██████████ Downbeat Magazine ███████ ███████ █████ ██████ 28,000 Hail Mary’s █████ ████████ seven come eleven ██████.

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Ted Holland

Ted holland attended college for four years. The year that he bothered to go to class he studied history. He majored in throwing quarters in the jukebox in the Student Union canteen and minored in a girl named Marsha. His books include This Day In African American Musicand B Western Actors Encyclopedia.