This Time the World REALLY IS Coming to an End

We’ve all seen the crazy guys with the signs reading, “The world coming to an end!” But this time, it really is.

By Scott Talbot Evans

When the universe was empty and void, it turned to itself and said, “Well, old chum, I guess that’s all there is, it’s all coming to an end.” But then the next thing they knew there was a big bang and a huge mess.

coming to an end, extinction event
When the dinosaurs thought it was all coming to an end. Public domain image

Later two dinosaurs were eating the tree tops when they saw a meteor flaming towards them. The brontosaurus turns to the stegosaurus and says, “Maybe there is something to climate change.” Then they’re extinct and the place is lousy with frogs and monkeys.

The Roman Empire was a powerful prosperous nation who thought they would last forever, but their senators took too many bribes and the next thing you know, there are hoards running of knights running around in suits of armor.

After that pilgrims arrived on Plymouth Rock. The natives worried that immigrants would ruin the country, but eventually their sacred images were removed from sports mascots, so all’s well that ends well.

When Lincoln signed the Emancipation Proclamation everyone thought it was the end of slavery. But as it turned out, people invented all sorts of new forms of slavery, so go figure.

The Nazis were sweeping across Europe, people thought it was the end, and for millions, they were right. But the good guys fought back and we thought genocide was over. But humans learned from their mistakes and invented more advanced methods for committing genocide.

When the Beatles wore long hair, the old generation thought it was the end to civilization as they knew it, and they were right. Sometimes you get it right.

When Brexit passed, people thought it was the end of the UK. And they were right. That’s two for two. But somehow those people managed to keep a stiff upper lip.

But usually you don’t know. When cells phones started tracking our locations, people thought Big Brother would turning us into 1984. And we were way off. We are so way past 1984 there’s no comparison.

Anything you do offends everyone. The only thing that still isn’t offensive is using the word “literally” too much, and the f-word, which is now officially an article of speech.

When Roe vs. Wade was overturned, some feared that we were descending into a religofascist state. And they were right! The fascists are taking over. The commies are taking over, too. And don’t forget the robots. The question is: where will we fit in, in a world run by commie fascist robots?

The values we hold so dear are crumbling away, but maybe that’s no so bad if hatred, violence, and corruption crumble too.

Yes, the world feels like it is coming to end, and it always will, because it is. We will forever be caught in the sensation like when you tip back too far in a chair.

Humor Times
Latest posts by Humor Times (see all)
Share
Share