Basic Military Training for Presidents - Ted Holland, Humor Times

Dispatches from SNN (Slobovian News Network)

The Slobovian Minister of Defense criticized the U.S. today, saying that the Commander-in-Chief should always have basic military training.

SNN combat reporter Gretta Grenade states that Slobovian Minister of Defense Brigadier General Bazooka Landmine Lawsrocket IV says that whoever the American president is, as Commander-in-Chief, they should undergo basic military training so they won’t blow up the world by accident.

Minister of Defense on basic military training. — Slobovian Minister of Defense schools U.S. on basic military training for presidents. AI generated image, CC0.

He stated, “America is crazy country… they biggest powerfulest army, they have big red button to blow up the world, and they make Commander-in-Chief guy who lawyer or lady who work in K-Mart once upon a time. America has war hero for President. Eisenhower big general, Kennedy Navy hero, Bush Air force hero. Now nobody president in military. No Clinton, no Obama, no Trumpski, no Biden, no Hillary, no Kamala lady.

“Next President should have to go to lovely Paris Island, crawl through mud, jump off tower, peel KP potatoes, clean latrine, sleep with M16, throw grenadeski.”

The Minister continued, “All leaders in Slobovia big war heroes. President General Blunt Force Trauma big war hero, I big war Hero, Minister of Agression Dr. Foxhole Grunt big war hero. Maybe for big American dollars we help you, come run American Military.”

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Ted Holland

Ted holland attended college for four years. The year that he bothered to go to class he studied history. He majored in throwing quarters in the jukebox in the Student Union canteen and minored in a girl named Marsha. His books include This Day In African American Musicand B Western Actors Encyclopedia.