[Disclaimer: This is a satirical news piece, just for fun, read at your own risk!]

Buttigieg Chosen as VP, Trump Wonders When He Turned ‘Queer’

Trump questions Mayor Pete’s sexual identity: “When did he turn queer?”

A leak by the Harris campaign indicates that presumptive Democratic presidential candidate Vice President Kamala D. Harris has selected Transportation Secretary Pete Buttigieg as her vice presidential running mate.

Pete Buttigieg, turned queer?
Pete Buttigieg. Photo: Gary Riggs, CC BY-SA 4.0

Speaking at a “Take Back the White” campaign rally in Charlottesville, VA, former President Donald J. Trump immediately questioned the sexual identity of the avowed gay man. “For years, he’s been known as ‘Mayor Pete, Mayor of South Bend, Indiana,’ ” shouted Trump. “Now, all of a sudden, he wakes up and says, ‘I’m queer!’ That’s what they call it now,” he added as an aside, ‘queer.'”

“I’ve been the best friend that the LGBTQ community ever had,” bellowed Trump into the microphone. “Gay unemployment was at record low levels during my administration, and I was instrumental in saving Historical Gay Colleges and Universities (HGCUs). Trump University was a gay university,” he added. “Ron DeSantis is a graduate of Trump U.”

Buttigieg was a candidate for the Democratic nomination for president in 2020, a contest which was eventually won by sitting President Joe Biden. Buttigieg accepted the Transportation Secretary post when Biden assumed office.

“I don’t know,” said Trump. “First he’s Mayor Pete, and then a Rhodes Scholar, Harvard grad, now suddenly he’s gay. What is he, a Harvard grad or gay?” Trump shook his head. “It’s sad,” he said. “Don’t get me wrong,” Trump went on. “Mayor Pete is smart; he graduated from Harvard Magna cum Laudanum, and that ain’t easy. I’m just questioning, when did he become LGBTQ?”

“Mayor Pete has two children. And my vice president, JD Vance, tells me that neither Buttigieg nor his ‘husband,’ ” and here the ex-president made air quotes, have given birth. That makes them unfulfilled, miserable cat sissies. It’s said,” he said again.

Bill Tope
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