Far-right talk radio host and prominent conspiracy theorist picked for press secretary for the Trump 2.0 administration.
Proceeding apace with naming pivotal members of his new administration, President-elect former President Donald J. Trump announced Wednesday that he has selected Alex Jones, late of the internet-video program Infowars as his press secretary for Trump 2.0.
Jones was sued by parents of children murdered in a mass shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary School in 2012. Jones repeatedly denigrated the incident as “contrived,” “made-up” and “bogus.” He maintained the no children died in the incident. Parents of the slaughtered children sued for defamation and were awarded damages of some $1.1 billion, effectively ruining the provocateur financially.
“I know Alex to be a man of great fortitude and candor,” said Trump from the restroom at Mar-a-Lago on Wednesday. “I expect Alex to represent the Trump Administration in the same manner in which he represented the marginalized elements of society who were trapped under the boot of the Biden Crime Family.
Jones could probably use a new job. Bankruptcy court sold Infowars to satirical outlet The Onion. Also in contention in the bidding for Infowars was the screamingly funny satire magazine, Humor Times. With a bid of $200, The Onion reportedly outbid Humor Times by a factor of four.
“Alex is a man of honor,” Trump said, “and I know that the American people can count on him. And this way, with a regular paycheck coming in, he will be able to service his debt. The press secretary for the Biden Administration gleaned $180,000 per year, but I’m of a mind to bump it up to 200K. That way,” said Trump, “by paying off the Sandy Hook families at a rate of 10% of his salary, he’ll be square in just over 50,000 years. Easy peasy.”
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