In an effort to get Americans to think about him 24/7, Trump makes the case for his face on Mount Rushmore.
Donald Trump says he’s calling on the American people, if not the whole world, to constantly think about him every hour of every single day. To help, he’s offered to add his magnificent visage to Mount Rushmore.
“People should have pictures of me in every room of their house,” said Trump. “Pictures of me at the schools. Monuments of me on the highways and byways in every state of America. Photos of me in restaurants, in office buildings, sports stadiums, in the bathroom, everywhere you go. That way people can think about me. Admire me. Love me, any time they feel the need and desire.”
Trump said his “brilliant” mug shot (which he’s selling for $250 a pop), that resulted from being indicted on criminal charges in Georgia, is now a collector’s item. The mug shot will always be there for anyone who can’t stop staring in wonderment and admiration at his likeness.
Trump said he was unlike Joe Biden who he contended Americans never want to think about or see again. “Sleepy Brain-Dead Joe will be so easily forgotten. The sooner we never again have to listen to him talk his stupid talk and disappears from the scene forever and ever, the better for all of us,” said Trump. “And take the rest of the Biden crime family with him. Okay?”
The once and future President Trump said every church and synagogue in America should hang a portrait of him from their pulpits. “That way they can pray to me. Adore me. Worship me. Because I am your president.” He added that having statues erected of him in front of the church might be an even better way to remind the faithful who they should idolize as their wonderful leader of the country. Critics might say the worshipers would be praying to a false god named Donald Trump.
But the Trump self-glamorization doesn’t stop there. His face, he said, should appear on the Mount Rushmore national monument in South Dakota, alongside four other presidents that includes Abraham Lincoln and George Washington. News reports say he has already spoken with South Dakota Governor Kristi Noem, herself infamous for shooting her own dog stone-cold dead, about having his face etched in stone.
Noem reported that Trump told her that “it’s my dream to have my face on Mount Rushmore.” Noem, Trump’s choice to lead the U.S. Department of Homeland Security, said she started laughing about the idea. “But Trump wasn’t laughing. He was totally serious,” said Noem.
News reports said that when Trump went to South Dakota for an Independence Day fireworks celebration, Noem greeted him with a four-foot Mount Rushmore replica made with Trump’s face on it.
Unfortunately for Trump, apparently there’s no more room for his head on the real Mount Rushmore.
According to a Mount Rushmore public information officer, “there’s no more space on the sculpture” to carve Trump’s face.
However, with Trump being the narcissistic blowhard that he is, one can imagine he will demand once he’s president again that they find room for him on the sculpture next to Honest Abe Lincoln or the father of our country, George Washington. The faces of the other two presidents on Mount Rushmore are Thedore Roosevelt and Thomas Jefferson. Knowing Trump’s craving for immortality, he could order that either the face of Roosevelt or Jefferson be removed to make room for his face.
“I’m the greatest President this country has ever had,” boasted Trump. Most historians rank Lincoln as the best president, followed by George Washington and Franklin Delano Roosevelt. Trump is ranked at about the bottom of that barrel.
Trump also says he’s thinking of starting a new television channel where viewers can watch him non-stop being president. They can view him eating breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Watch him watching Fox News. Watch him as he signs executive orders that mandates every single illegal immigrant will be kicked out of the country. Watch him board Air Force One on his way to his Mar-a-Lago estate in Florida. Watch him as he hosts grand dinner parties for fellow fat cats at Mar-a-Lago. Watch him tee off on the first hole at his different Trump National Golf Courses in Florida, New Jersey and elsewhere around the world. Watch him as foreign leaders kiss his ring at various international conferences. And see him being saluted by Marine guards as he disembarks from his helicopter back on the White House grounds.
As the lyrics to the Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons song goes as it applies to Trump, ‘You’re just too good to be true. Can’t take my eyes off of you.”
“You’ve got that exactly right. I am too good to be true,” Trump modestly said as he headed upstairs to the White House bedroom. That’s where we can all watch him change into evening attire wearing his Trump-autographed boxer shorts that he’s selling to the general public at $150 a pop.
“But if you hurry, I’ll give you a special deal of $20 off the regular price for the boxer shorts, okay?” said Trump. “Another collector’s item that every red-blooded patriotic American should own.”
- Trump Orders Valve Search to Solve L.A. Water Crisis - January 28, 2025
- Exclusive: What Trump and Obama Were Laughing About at Carter Funeral - January 22, 2025
- Trump Seeks Best Disease to Justify Deporting Illegal Aliens - January 17, 2025
