Trump to Renovate Heaven - Marilyn Sands, Humor Times

Trump plans to Renovate Heaven, haul ‘Asses to Ashes’ living his Master Builder Dream! Top 5 Enticement Offers!

THE DEVIL to Trump re: ‘Renovate Heaven’ project

You can’t just move residents of Heaven into Hell while you renovate & build!

TRUMP

They won’t mind.

THE DEVIL

Everyone in Heaven earned the right to be there.

TRUMP

We won’t own it.

THE DEVIL

Trust me – you don’t want to be here.

TRUMP

I’m good at this stuff – last week I changed the Mediterranean Sea to the Gulf of Bibi!

THE DEVIL

I don’t have a fork in this fight – but this isn’t your business.

TRUMP

We wouldn’t have to buy Hell – it’s all on the up & up.

THE DEVIL

Don’t try to fool me – I’ve got your number!

TRUMP

No you don’t, Elon helped me change it!

THE DEVIL

Wait! Somebody just came down. Gotta ‘Meet & Greet’!

TRUMP

Well, we’re going in by Saturday, 12 O’ Clock!

THE DEVIL

Tough guy, huh? Talk to you at 1!

TRUMP

Mommy!

Trump’s Top 5 Transition Enticements to Temporary Hell Residents:

5. Toll Booth Fees waived from Heaven to Hell!

4. Air-Conditioned Carpool Lanes!

3. Our Trading Post Consignment Shoppe Slogan: ‘Give us your Wings…we give you FORKS!’

2. Compassionate Counsel offered when switching dietary habits from ‘Steak Tartar’ to ‘Blackened Fish’!

And the #1 Transition Enticement for Temporary Hell Residents…

Free guilt-free guidance in re-naming your Baby – from ‘Allison’ to ‘Hades’!

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Marilyn Sands

Marilyn Sands is a former 80's Stand-Up Comic & Comic Booker. Sold Jokes to Joan Rivers & lesser lights. Was up one night & wrote 2 Madcap Screenplays & a Stage Play. Her hilarious book "CAN YOU PEE OUTDOORS" On-Line Dating Straight Lines is on amazon.com/dp/1733487409And, "OWNING THE STAGE, RENTING THE BALLS"!My Life as a Funny Girlis on amazon.com/dp/1733487417"Living proofyou don't have to be a success to write a Memoir"!And yes, this bio is my OBIT too!haha