Trump Tweets State of the Union, Introduces 'White Guy Doctrine'

Having an important golf date to get to in Mar-a-Lago, president ‘tweets-in’ his so-called ‘State of the Union’ address.

Having an important golf date to get to in Mar-a-Lago, Trump decided to tweet his State of the Union address. When asked if it was appropriate for a President to skip the State of the Union, Trump replied, “I’ve got a country club to run, too. Can’t be presidenting all the time. I’ve got Bannon for that.”

Trump tweets State of the Union — Trump introduces White Guy Doctrine via tweeted ‘State of the Union.’

In his State of the Union tweets, Trump covered a broad range of topics, including the economy, his budget plans, and foreign policy. He also introduced what’s being called the “White Guy Doctrine.” Here are the President’s SOTU tweets:

His introduction:

I won popular vote and won the Electoral College in a landslide! All former presidents SAD.
Why doesn’t Twitter have a Rocky emoji?

The economy:

Secret Muslim Obama did BAD job. DUMB. I’m a smart person.
Will bring jobs back. Coal jobs. Auto jobs. Horse and buggy jobs. Who stole our horse and buggy jobs?!! China!!

Taxes:

Lots of tax cuts for the rich. Good for America. Raising taxes on lazy poor. #MAGA

Domestic spending:

No arts. No food stamps. No clean air. No weak liberal programs. Too expensive. Cost almost as much as a couple of B2 bombers.
Social security safe for my SMART old voters. Not for DUMB millennials. Don’t like it? Move to Canada. #MAGA

Trump defines the White Guy Doctrine:

UK good. White guys. Russia good. White guys with video. China bad. Not white guys. Canada good. Mexico bad.
Ivanka sends kisses to Justin. I<3J
Kisses to Putin from you know who.

The wall:

Building wall. Mexicans will pay for it. We will not be questioned. (Got that from Stephen Miller. Love it.). Reminder to Mexico – we have tanks.

Immigration:

Non-white guys must go. Non-white guy citizen must go. No Muslims. Not white guys.

Military spending:

Lots and lots of B2 bombers. And tanks. Can you ever have too many tanks?

Introduces new hash tag:

Did you like #MAGA? New hash tag! #MAWA Make America White Again! We can do it!
Why doesn’t Twitter have a tiny, orange fist pump emoji?

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Ron Keith

Ron Keith lives in Washington, DC. He freelances, mostly writing on renewable energy, technology, gaming, and anything else he feels a passion for. He plans to spend the Trump years in a fetal position and learning what an emolument is.