Air Force One is infested, and not in a good way
President Trump’s C-PAC Conference speech with his rendition of Aesop’s Fable reminded me of my raging Ophidiophobia & any movie with snakes!
My first symptoms? Panic attack on Election Day. My nemesis: The Yellow Bellied Bone Spur Snake.
I know, I know — New York City is not their natural habitat — but where do you think Snakeskin wallets come from & all with your choice of pics inside:
If you aren’t familiar with the fable, ‘The Farmer & the Snake”; the moral of the story is:
‘Learn from my fate not to take pity on a scoundrel.’
But, what really comes to my mind is a song from the 1951 (my mother told me, all right) movie musical “Royal Wedding” with Fred Astaire & Jane Powell singing.
“How Could You Believe Me When I Said I Loved You When You Know I’ve Been a Liar All My Life!”
Sorry folks, but you just don’t forget these obscure songs & believe me; I’ve tried!
My kids know I wouldn’t be caught dead watching that creepy 2006 “Snakes on a Plane” movie — in a theater or safely in my snake-less house…
…I won’t even go to Monty Python comedies!
It’s not surprising that 1/3 of all adults have this same phobia; but I also have a fear of Snake Charmers & Baskets — frigin’ Picnics put me over the edge!
It’s so bad, I dream of Snakes — nah, forget about Freud; I’m going with last night’s Chimichanga Grande!
Right now, I’m starting to freak-out big time! I’ve got a butt-crack Plumber hanging over my sink with a long somethin’ somethin’ & don’t know whether to grab a net or call the cops!
I hope I never have to use this tip — but, you know what they say — if you’re ever bitten by one; never suck out the venom… or vote Republican again!
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