Exclusive! We’ve obtained this very interesting transcript of a discussion among top Dems about the possibility of a ‘self-pardon’ by Trump.
NANCY PELOSI
So, do you think he’s gonna Self-Pardon?
CHUCK SCHUMER
Why not – he made a suit out of the Drapes, didn’t he?
CHUCK
I heard if he’s not pardoned – Butterball wants to be frozen!
NANCY
I knew there was a reason to become a Vegan!
Have you noticed how he has trouble going down Ramps?
CHUCK
It’s nothing – all Poultry does that!
NANCY
And, what’s with his tiny webbed hands?
CHUCK
They don’t have hands – they’re wings!
NANCY
Well, this dirty bird’s on the No-Fly List till he pays everybody he owes!
CHUCK
Is that why Melania told him to stop wearing Striped Pajamas – because it feels like a Conjugal Visit!
NANCY
Remember the last Thanksgiving Bird – he’s got to be part Parrot! Before he was pardoned, he kept on repeating ‘306’, ‘306’, ‘306’!
CHUCK
Who can forget Mr. Lucky’s Russian-Assisted Keno numbers!
NANCY
But, worst of all – he knows nothing about traditional Thanksgiving manners!
CHUCK
You mean last year when he was offered, ‘White or Dark’ & he said, ‘Either – there’s very fine meat on both sides’!
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