Democrats Riled, or Bunnies Grow Fangs
The Democrats are showing fangs: no longer just hopping around like baby rabbits playing tag in a shaded glen. And once again America reaches for the Tylenol after … Read more
election
GOP to Bring in The Fixer: ‘Turd Blossom’ Karl Rove
Karl Rove could be the party’s last resort to stop Donald Trump It is common knowledge that Donald Trump continues his popularity among the conservative populace who aren’t … Read more
BREAKING: Koch Brothers Running for President
The Koch brothers have decided that they will have to be the Republican presidential candidates themselves. An anonymous source has informed this reporter that the Koch brothers are … Read more
Trump Plays Hardball for the Baseball Vote: Transcript
The Humor Times has obtained this exclusive transcript of Donald Trump promising to make baseball great again. We’re going to make America’s Game great again. The Dominicans are … Read more
Bernie Sanders Receives $225,000 Debate Invoice from Hillary Clinton
Hillary says speaking invoice includes senior discount for Bernie WASHINGTON — Earlier today, Democratic presidential candidate U.S. Senator Bernie Sanders of Vermont received a response to his proposition … Read more
Someone Should Remind Trump Women Can Vote Too Now
Donald Trump isn’t damaging the GOP as much as he’s lifting the rocks they’ve been hiding under. Go ahead, exhale a deep sigh of relief because our long … Read more
Radiohead Demands Ted Cruz Start Using ‘Creep’
Demand seen as part of a trend of bands suggesting songs for politicians like Ted Cruz to use, rather than just demanding they stop using certain tunes. Radiohead … Read more
Corporate Media Begins Adding Fangs to Images of Bernie Sanders
Media seeking to be ‘fair and balanced’ by adding vampire fangs to all images of Bernie Sanders. WASHINGTON — Today, a confidential memo between American corporate media outlets … Read more
Trump’s Mama is So Fat
How low can you go? Political limbo: Donald Trump’s hand size, vulgar personal insults, candidates’ wives… a primary even the National Enquirer could love. How low can a … Read more
Hillary Promises to Give Bernie Sanders His Positions Back After Primary
Hillary Clinton promises to give Bernie Sanders all of his policy positions back once she has won the Democratic presidential nomination. WASHINGTON — Today, Democratic presidential front-runner and … Read more
