The Statue of Liberty’s First Message: “My Arm’s Tired”

The Statue of Liberty’s First Message: “My Arm’s Tired”
WP_Post Object
(
    [ID] => 26969
    [post_author] => 1219
    [post_date] => 2014-07-06 00:59:54
    [post_date_gmt] => 2014-07-06 07:59:54
    [post_content] => 

Statue of Liberty breaks long silence

After more than a century of silence, the Statue of Liberty has finally spoken.  Yesterday evening, as the last few tourists ambled around her viewing platforms, she shocked the U.S. and the rest of the world when she revealed her ability to communicate. Statue of LibertyThe young girl who spoke to her, however, wasn't surprised at all. Maria Gonzalez, daughter of two Cuban immigrants who came to America in search of a better life, said she had always wanted to see the iconic statue because of all that she had meant to her parents. And from the moment she arrived in New York harbor, she struck up a conversation with her favorite lady, asking her about her likes and hobbies and if she ever had a boyfriend. It was when she asked her how she was doing, that she actually replied. "Maria was simply too cute to not say anything," Lady Liberty said. "And she and her family are exactly who I want to feel welcome here." Later on, when members of the press came, they followed up on why her arm was so tired. "You try holding this lamp up for over a hundred years," she said to Fox News. "Besides, with all of your new immigration laws, is it even worth it anymore?" "Give me your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses, yearning to breath free, The wretched refuse of your teeming shore, Send these, the homeless, tempest tost to me, I lift my lamp beside the golden door." -- Emma Lazarus [post_title] => The Statue of Liberty's First Message: "My Arm's Tired" [post_excerpt] => [post_status] => publish [comment_status] => open [ping_status] => open [post_password] => [post_name] => statue-of-liberty-arm-is-tired [to_ping] => [pinged] => [post_modified] => 2015-08-11 19:25:44 [post_modified_gmt] => 2015-08-12 02:25:44 [post_content_filtered] => [post_parent] => 0 [guid] => https://www.humortimes.com/?p=26969 [menu_order] => 0 [post_type] => post [post_mime_type] => [comment_count] => 0 [filter] => raw )

Statue of Liberty breaks long silence After more than a century of silence, the Statue of Liberty has finally spoken.  Yesterday evening, as the last few tourists ambled … Read more

World Cup Hemorrhaging Fans Due to Math Skills Prerequisite

World Cup Hemorrhaging Fans Due to Math Skills Prerequisite
WP_Post Object
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    [ID] => 26848
    [post_author] => 1219
    [post_date] => 2014-06-28 10:47:37
    [post_date_gmt] => 2014-06-28 17:47:37
    [post_content] => 

Figuring out who advances just too much for many World Cup fans

Every four years, the World Cup fan base gets smaller and smaller.  The reason: mathematics. FIFA estimates that millions of fans from various countries and demographics, most of which carry degrees in the humanities, have completely given up on following their national team because it's hurting their brain. World Cup FansWorking out what each team needs to accomplish in order to make one of the top two slots in their group requires more than what many fans have bargained for: basic algebra skills and the ability to foresee and compute countless scenarios. Basically, too much. If you follow a team like Germany or the Netherlands -- who will win all or most of their group stage games -- you have little to worry about and can have a relaxing, enjoyable World Cup experience.  If you're a fan of a team like America, however, you are in for a rude awakening. One U.S. fan opened up to us about her experience -- one that is all too common. "As a new follower of the sport I got totally immersed in USMNT fever.  The friendlies.  Altidore's goals.  And then our win against Ghana!  I thought, 'This is a piece of cake. We win some, tie some maybe, and we're golden.'  But then I started hearing strange things like 'goal differential' and 'goal average' and even 'calculating scenarios' for God's sake.  So, yeah, I wish them all the best," she said. If you read the fine print in FIFA's contractual agreements for "hard core" fans you'll notice a subtle warning that alludes to the numerical black hole one can get sucked in if one is not careful. Here is a shocking, unfortunate example: [caption id="attachment_26850" align="alignnone" width="480"]World Cup math World Cup fan calculates his teams chances to advance.[/caption] [post_title] => World Cup Hemorrhaging Fans Due to Math Skills Prerequisite [post_excerpt] => [post_status] => publish [comment_status] => open [ping_status] => open [post_password] => [post_name] => world-cup-fans-need-math-skills [to_ping] => [pinged] => [post_modified] => 2015-08-11 19:25:18 [post_modified_gmt] => 2015-08-12 02:25:18 [post_content_filtered] => [post_parent] => 0 [guid] => https://www.humortimes.com/?p=26848 [menu_order] => 0 [post_type] => post [post_mime_type] => [comment_count] => 0 [filter] => raw )

Figuring out who advances just too much for many World Cup fans Every four years, the World Cup fan base gets smaller and smaller.  The reason: mathematics. FIFA … Read more

American Tourist in Italy Excited to Visit the ‘Sixteenth Chapel’

American Tourist in Italy Excited to Visit the ‘Sixteenth Chapel’
WP_Post Object
(
    [ID] => 26465
    [post_author] => 1219
    [post_date] => 2014-06-22 13:52:18
    [post_date_gmt] => 2014-06-22 20:52:18
    [post_content] => 

Seeking to broaden his horizons, an American tourist visits Italy

American tourist and college grad, Richard Head, recently decided it was time to get some culture in his life. Or, in his words, 16th century porn. American Tourist, sistine chapelAfter "learning" about the paintings that ornamented the lavish walls of the Vatican's famous "Sixteenth Chapel," he logically assumed that this was how all Italians lived and dressed, and so, of course, he wanted to see it for himself. However, he hesitated for a brief moment because he thought it a bit strange that so much nudity would be found in chapels of all places. But he didn't hesitate for long because so much culture awaited. Upon arriving in the Fiumicino airport, he hurriedly made his way through the tarmac and into the waiting area, fully expecting a cornucopia of lounging flesh similar to what one might find on Mount Olympus. The disappointment on his face was evident. However, he quickly recovered and encouraged himself with the knowledge that they probably wouldn't want to freak people out too much right off the bat, so the airport couldn't have been a good indicator of the rest of the country. But, as he exited and made his way to the cabs, he began to wonder if he had made a huge mistake. "Do you know where I can find the Sixteenth Chapel?" he queried one taxi driver.  "And the other fifteen too if you have time." "Idiota Americano, si?" the driver asked in return. "No, I don't want a coffee.  Take me to see the good stuff." "Per l'amor di Dio!" exclaimed the driver in frustration as he got in his taxi and drove away. [post_title] => American Tourist in Italy Excited to Visit the 'Sixteenth Chapel' [post_excerpt] => [post_status] => publish [comment_status] => open [ping_status] => open [post_password] => [post_name] => american-tourist-visits-sixteenth-chapel [to_ping] => [pinged] => [post_modified] => 2015-08-11 19:24:57 [post_modified_gmt] => 2015-08-12 02:24:57 [post_content_filtered] => [post_parent] => 0 [guid] => https://www.humortimes.com/?p=26465 [menu_order] => 0 [post_type] => post [post_mime_type] => [comment_count] => 0 [filter] => raw )

Seeking to broaden his horizons, an American tourist visits Italy American tourist and college grad, Richard Head, recently decided it was time to get some culture in his … Read more

Milk Stamp Boycott Highlights Extreme Lactose Intolerance

Milk Stamp Boycott Highlights Extreme Lactose Intolerance
WP_Post Object
(
    [ID] => 26213
    [post_author] => 1219
    [post_date] => 2014-06-06 16:09:43
    [post_date_gmt] => 2014-06-06 23:09:43
    [post_content] => Milk Stamp Boycott

Lactophobia revealed by Milk stamp boycott

On May 22nd, the White House posthumously commemorated a new stamp in honor of Harvey Milk, the first member of the lactose community to openly drink milk as an adult politician. Immediately after its release, the American Family Association -- a group identified as "lactose intolerant" -- announced a Milk stamp boycott and encouraged all of their members to do the same. They also encourage people not to even open any mail bearing the stamp. "To disagree with drinking milk as an adult is one thing," Postmaster General Richard Donahoe said upon hearing of the boycott. "But to object to all things dairy? That's a bit much." A recent poll indicates that, though an increasing number of people are treating all drinks the same now, there are still quite a few who judge drinks, rank them according to goodness, and deem a few in particular completely unacceptable (even though a number of the drinks they've labelled as 'good' actually lack the beneficial ingredients they claim to have). Debate still rages as to whether or not a person is born lactose intolerant or if they choose to hate milk because of exposure or bad experiences when they were young. "It's tough to say definitively," offered milk scientist Jenn Ralmills.  "I've seen children show aversion to milk very early on without any encouragement whatsoever.  But I've also known countless identical twins (children who came from the same sperm and egg and thus share the same DNA) who end up on two different paths -- one child is a milk-drinker but the other starts out with a slight aversion to it and then eventually becomes lactose intolerant." When asked about her own personal opinion, she balked. "As a scientist, that's as far as I'll go.  But as a human being, I will say this: I used to be lactose intolerant when I was younger, but now I find that no drink is perfect, and that every drink is much, much more than the labels we put on them." [post_title] => Milk Stamp Boycott Highlights Extreme Lactose Intolerance [post_excerpt] => [post_status] => publish [comment_status] => open [ping_status] => open [post_password] => [post_name] => milk-stamp-boycott-extreme-lactose-intolerance [to_ping] => [pinged] => [post_modified] => 2017-10-11 16:03:44 [post_modified_gmt] => 2017-10-11 23:03:44 [post_content_filtered] => [post_parent] => 0 [guid] => https://www.humortimes.com/?p=26213 [menu_order] => 0 [post_type] => post [post_mime_type] => [comment_count] => 0 [filter] => raw )

Lactophobia revealed by Milk stamp boycott On May 22nd, the White House posthumously commemorated a new stamp in honor of Harvey Milk, the first member of the lactose … Read more

Kanzi, World’s Smartest Ape, Still Not Making Headway on Whole Poo Eating Thing

Kanzi, World’s Smartest Ape, Still Not Making Headway on Whole Poo Eating Thing
WP_Post Object
(
    [ID] => 26052
    [post_author] => 1219
    [post_date] => 2014-05-29 16:33:41
    [post_date_gmt] => 2014-05-29 23:33:41
    [post_content] => 

Most apes, like Kanzi, have what to us are very strange cravings

Kanzi, the world's most intelligent animal, sits inside his sunlit cage, dreaming of poo.

This very special bonobo ape lives in Des Moines, Iowa under the watchful care of scientists with the Great Ape Trust, where he spends his days making fires, communicating through computerized pictograms, and, now and again, snacking on choice dumps.

kanziThough trained by intelligent, higher-order mammals, the things this chimp has learned is nothing short of astonishing.

Kanzi is the brother to another special ape Panbanisha, who died in 2012 of symptoms related to a cold -- possibly due to poor care from the woman who used to train them, Dr. Sue Savage-Rumbaugh.  Though she was later reinstated because of her uncanny connection with the animal kingdom -- from hearing the first puppy speak English to being able to listen to the thoughts of turtles -- she eventually left the center and moved to New Jersey.

"Kanzi has a working vocabulary of over one thousand words," Dr. Savage-Rumbaugh boasted joyfully.  "He had even learned to string simple sentences together (some of which were very imaginative)."

"I remember his very first sentence," she went on nostalgically.  "He came over to the lexigram board around lunch time and pointed at 'eat,' as he normal does, but then he pointed at 'poop' immediately afterwards.  Of course, he's not able to use conjunctions and articles but I knew he was saying he wanted to eat lunch first and then use the restroom.  What a gentleman he was!"

"Although, for some reason he didn't want the banana we tried to give him."

[post_title] => Kanzi, World's Smartest Ape, Still Not Making Headway on Whole Poo Eating Thing [post_excerpt] => [post_status] => publish [comment_status] => open [ping_status] => open [post_password] => [post_name] => kanzi-smartest-ape-eats-poo [to_ping] => [pinged] => [post_modified] => 2015-08-11 19:24:04 [post_modified_gmt] => 2015-08-12 02:24:04 [post_content_filtered] => [post_parent] => 0 [guid] => https://www.humortimes.com/?p=26052 [menu_order] => 0 [post_type] => post [post_mime_type] => [comment_count] => 0 [filter] => raw )

Most apes, like Kanzi, have what to us are very strange cravings Kanzi, the world’s most intelligent animal, sits inside his sunlit cage, dreaming of poo. This very … Read more

Amazing Race to Release ‘Sad Sack Race’ for the Rest of Us

Amazing Race to Release ‘Sad Sack Race’ for the Rest of Us
WP_Post Object
(
    [ID] => 25796
    [post_author] => 1219
    [post_date] => 2014-05-25 16:36:21
    [post_date_gmt] => 2014-05-25 23:36:21
    [post_content] => 

Amazing Race for the un-amazing

The CBS finale of Amazing Race All-Stars 2014 did not disappoint, and the world once again was able to live vicariously through beautiful, (mostly) young, well-toned human beings. Amazing Race to Release 'Sad Sack Race'However, after going back and reviewing the millions and millions of video submissions from normal, everyday Americans, the producers of the hit show felt that they weren't accurately reflecting their fan base and were only contributing to the expanding disconnect between reality and reality TV. "Take this one for instance," host and producer Phil Keoghan offered.  "This guy's in his mid to late thirties, probably majored in literature or something, can't climb an actual staircase much less a corporate one, and so he has to try and win money on reality TV competitions.  It's sad, really.  But hey, that was the whole idea behind Sad Sacks 2015 -- it will be like turning your television into a mirror." According to the designers of the race, the challenges, detours, pit stops, and overall difficulty level will be adjusted according to the competitors' ability.  Furthermore, the trips themselves will be adjusted to meet their level of ethnocentrism (which will probably be high). For example, instead of making them travel from Paris, France to Athens, Greece they will only have to travel from Paris, Texas to Athens, Georgia. Local Sad Sack hopeful and longtime Amazing Race fan, Jay Elbee, was asked if he took offense to the new show's title. "Hey, I don't care if they take a dump in a sack and make me carry it around the whole time, it wouldn't matter after getting the money." To which Phil replied, "You know, I think that is one of the detours." [post_title] => Amazing Race to Release 'Sad Sack Race' for the Rest of Us [post_excerpt] => [post_status] => publish [comment_status] => open [ping_status] => open [post_password] => [post_name] => amazing-race-for-rest-of-us [to_ping] => [pinged] => [post_modified] => 2015-08-11 19:23:55 [post_modified_gmt] => 2015-08-12 02:23:55 [post_content_filtered] => [post_parent] => 0 [guid] => https://www.humortimes.com/?p=25796 [menu_order] => 0 [post_type] => post [post_mime_type] => [comment_count] => 0 [filter] => raw )

Amazing Race for the un-amazing The CBS finale of Amazing Race All-Stars 2014 did not disappoint, and the world once again was able to live vicariously through beautiful, … Read more

DC and Marvel Villains Becoming Good Guys to Land Lucrative Ad Deals

DC and Marvel Villains Becoming Good Guys to Land Lucrative Ad Deals
WP_Post Object
(
    [ID] => 25695
    [post_author] => 1219
    [post_date] => 2014-05-20 16:06:52
    [post_date_gmt] => 2014-05-20 23:06:52
    [post_content] => 

"What can we say? We're looking for alternative and safer ways to make money." - DC, Marvel villains

It pays to be a good guy. On the heels of big time advertisement campaigns starring iconic superheroes like Spiderman, The Hulk, Superman, Iron Man, etc. the union officially representing the villains of DC and Marvel released the statement of the century yesterday. DC and Marvel Villains Becoming Good Guys, Spiderman"In the interests of our clients, the DCU, MU, and the world at large, we--the ones callously labeled as 'bad guys'--would like to announce our complete resignation (in perpetuity) from any and all evil plots, plans, schemes, etc. that would (directly or indirectly) cause the harm and/or destruction of the planet, humans, and...well...yeah, we guess superheroes, too." This shocking announcement has left their respective universes reeling in disbelief and the response--from superheroes more than anyone--has been one of complete cynicism. "Yeah right, is all I have to say," responded Batman. "I can think of one guy who is having you all for a laugh: The Joker.  HIS NAME IS JOKER! Come on!  It's not an expression with him when I say 'he can't be serious'; he actually can't be serious." As we listened to the Dark Knight, we could see the wheels turning in Robin's head...and then a light seemed to go on. "Holy unholy holiness, Batman!" he shouted.  "If the bad guys are becoming good, but it's a false good because of bad motives, what kind of good is it?!" "You are one strange bird, my friend," the caped crusader said while shaking his bat head. "Actually, Robin makes a valid point," interjected Captain America. "They are toying with the very fabric of our moral universe and must be stopped from becoming good." "YOU ARROGANT, SELF-RIGHTEOUS PRIGS!!" screamed Scream as she leapt in fury toward the first avenger. "You all are in it for the money--what kind of goodness is that?!" And with that, fists pounded, teeth and claws were bared, and weapons, tentacles, and other projectiles flew. And all was right (and wrong) with the world again. "Well, that lasted a full minute," Iron Man said dryly to Cyclops as his solar ray blasted the enemy. "That's gotta be some kind of record." [post_title] => DC and Marvel Villains Becoming Good Guys to Land Lucrative Ad Deals [post_excerpt] => [post_status] => publish [comment_status] => open [ping_status] => open [post_password] => [post_name] => marvel-villains-land-ad-deals [to_ping] => [pinged] => [post_modified] => 2015-08-11 19:23:41 [post_modified_gmt] => 2015-08-12 02:23:41 [post_content_filtered] => [post_parent] => 0 [guid] => https://www.humortimes.com/?p=25695 [menu_order] => 0 [post_type] => post [post_mime_type] => [comment_count] => 0 [filter] => raw )

“What can we say? We’re looking for alternative and safer ways to make money.” – DC, Marvel villains It pays to be a good guy. On the heels … Read more

Star Wars Episode 7 Revealed: The Drone Wars

Star Wars Episode 7 Revealed: The Drone Wars
WP_Post Object
(
    [ID] => 25645
    [post_author] => 1219
    [post_date] => 2014-05-16 20:02:59
    [post_date_gmt] => 2014-05-17 03:02:59
    [post_content] => 

New Star Wars could launch post-presidential career

"Not long ago, in a galaxy far, far beyond the reach of justice and peace, a strange and bitter conflict arose on the dark and inhospitable planet known as Yemen." Star Wars, Drone WarsSo begins the highly anticipated JJ Abrams continuation of the intergalactic epic, Star Wars, and, along with it, the continuation of a worldwide love affair with Wookies, droids, Ewoks, bounty hunters, and the like. With some of the casting of episode 7 already released, Abrams kept the lead roles and the title of the movie cloaked in mystery...until today. "I've had my eye on the president for a while, actually," the famed director admitted.  "Politicians are natural actors, which is why so many of them have made the transition from the studio to the hill so seamlessly." "G-dub will be reprising his role as Darth Bush and Cheney will return as Emperor Buckshot, of course.  Now, what I love about Obama's role in this new Star Wars is that it is not at all one-dimensional.  Basically, as a young Jedi, he (Obama Peacemaker) rises to power on the back of idealistic promises and is even awarded the Galactic Peace Prize.  But then, when he fails to fulfill those promises and even expands the evil of Darth Bush (which he vowed to eradicate), he gives in to the dark side." "I don't want to give too much away but my favorite scene is where Darth Barack -- deep in the recesses of Gitmo (an alien torture chamber) -- rises from the shadows with 'kill list' in hand, and declares war on the hapless planets of Pakistan and Yemen." Asked if episode seven will be able to live up to the hyperdrive level of expectations, Abrams was confident but calculated. "There's a lot of great backstory here that hasn't been developed and that the public is completely unaware of.  Let me just say, I'm really excited about it." In other words, it's gonna be the sh--. [post_title] => Star Wars Episode 7 Revealed: The Drone Wars [post_excerpt] => [post_status] => publish [comment_status] => open [ping_status] => open [post_password] => [post_name] => star-wars-drone-wars [to_ping] => [pinged] => [post_modified] => 2015-08-11 19:23:18 [post_modified_gmt] => 2015-08-12 02:23:18 [post_content_filtered] => [post_parent] => 0 [guid] => https://www.humortimes.com/?p=25645 [menu_order] => 0 [post_type] => post [post_mime_type] => [comment_count] => 0 [filter] => raw )

New Star Wars could launch post-presidential career “Not long ago, in a galaxy far, far beyond the reach of justice and peace, a strange and bitter conflict arose … Read more

Tiger Mom: “Get into Harvard, then come tell me Happy F#%ing Mother’s Day”

Tiger Mom: “Get into Harvard, then come tell me Happy F#%ing Mother’s Day”
WP_Post Object
(
    [ID] => 25524
    [post_author] => 1219
    [post_date] => 2014-05-11 15:45:36
    [post_date_gmt] => 2014-05-11 22:45:36
    [post_content] => 

Tiger Moms not impressed by standard Mother's Day

This mother's day weekend, Yale Law Professor, Amy Chua, co-author of the well-known book, Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mom, is releasing her new book, Tiger Mother's Day, or, Everyday My Kid's Not an Idiot, Waste of Space Day. Mother's DayThe book is already drawing a huge response online and is quickly becoming the number one sought after Mother's Day gift from kids everywhere, especially guilt-ridden underachievers. Mrs. Chua attempts to highlight the aspects of an above average, extremely successful Mother's Day (or Tiger Mom's Day) and goes on to contend that this kind of day should be a regular occurrence and not an annual "make-up-for-my-failed-existence" kind of thing. Here are just a couple of nuggets that she has used to help train her own children in understanding the difference:

Mother's Day: Knitted coffee mug warmer

Tiger Mother's Day: Knitted coffee mug warmer from home-raised, hand-picked cotton

Mother's Day: Roses

Tiger Mother's Day: Genetically altered flowers that withstand radiation

"The idea for this book," Mrs. Chua revealed, "started out many years ago when my youngest daughter, Lulu (then age five), brought me a watercolor portrait of myself, and I responded like any mother with standards should: "Is this art?  If you call cheap underdeveloped Monet knockoffs art, then yes, I guess it's Mother's Day." "And now, it seems things are repeating themselves (as I've told my girls countless times in our impromptu midnight history lessons).  Lulu came in to tell me that she had been accepted into Yale of all places, and I said, 'Is that supposed to make me happy?  Didn't we learn this lesson twelve years ago?" Mrs. Chua admits that this road isn't easy and that many parents will encounter failure along the way.  But she encourages them not to give up on their kids the same way they gave up on themselves and their own dreams. "For all those wannabe tiger moms out there: Your kids don't have to turn out like you.  Buy my book and give yourself the Mother's Day you deserve!" [post_title] => Tiger Mom: "Get into Harvard, then come tell me Happy F#%ing Mother's Day" [post_excerpt] => [post_status] => publish [comment_status] => open [ping_status] => open [post_password] => [post_name] => tiger-mom-mothers-day [to_ping] => [pinged] => [post_modified] => 2015-08-11 19:00:23 [post_modified_gmt] => 2015-08-12 02:00:23 [post_content_filtered] => [post_parent] => 0 [guid] => https://www.humortimes.com/?p=25524 [menu_order] => 0 [post_type] => post [post_mime_type] => [comment_count] => 0 [filter] => raw )

Tiger Moms not impressed by standard Mother’s Day This mother’s day weekend, Yale Law Professor, Amy Chua, co-author of the well-known book, Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mom, … Read more

Hillary Clinton Asks Woman to Throw Second Shoe, Matching Handbag

Hillary Clinton Asks Woman to Throw Second Shoe, Matching Handbag
WP_Post Object
(
    [ID] => 25476
    [post_author] => 1219
    [post_date] => 2014-05-07 13:32:17
    [post_date_gmt] => 2014-05-07 20:32:17
    [post_content] => 

Shoe-lover Hillary Clinton would like more, please.

Former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, as everyone knows, had a shoe thrown at her a little less than a month ago at a meeting to discuss recycling and waste management in Las Vegas. [caption id="attachment_25498" align="alignright" width="400"]Hillary clinton shoe Hillary Clinton: "Is that all you got?"[/caption] Apparently, though, it was all just a big misunderstanding. Mrs. Clinton's press team released a statement yesterday expressing thanks to the woman who gave her the shoe and that the former first lady absolutely loves it. According to witnesses at the event, the shoe-lady, identified later as Alison Ernst, only had time to give her the one shoe since she was immediately tackled by very large men and taken away. The press official went on to say that if Ms. Ernst could go ahead and meet them at the next scheduled speaking event, she is free to throw the rest of the ensemble in the general direction of Mrs. Clinton (who will be ready this time). "It actually wasn't an athletic shoe like everyone thought," the former first lady said. "It was a lovely grey and blue pump that matches a dress I have." [post_title] => Hillary Clinton Asks Woman to Throw Second Shoe, Matching Handbag [post_excerpt] => [post_status] => publish [comment_status] => open [ping_status] => open [post_password] => [post_name] => hillary-clinton-asks-for-second-shoe [to_ping] => [pinged] => http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/hillary-clinton-shoe-throw-woman-3404867 [post_modified] => 2019-03-19 13:18:03 [post_modified_gmt] => 2019-03-19 20:18:03 [post_content_filtered] => [post_parent] => 0 [guid] => https://www.humortimes.com/?p=25476 [menu_order] => 0 [post_type] => post [post_mime_type] => [comment_count] => 0 [filter] => raw )

Shoe-lover Hillary Clinton would like more, please. Former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, as everyone knows, had a shoe thrown at her a little less than a month … Read more

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