World Unites to Demand U.S. End Proliferation of ‘Balls’ Jokes
No more deflated balls, please: UN Resolution calls on Americans to ‘Grow up, for God’s sake’ New York — A UN resolution, sponsored by a broad coalition of … Read more
funny
Lost Journal: Pleading No Contest to Trivia
Journal entry: December 9, 1994 (age 25) – Trivia Geographically speaking, my life is perfect. I live in the trendy Dupont Circle neighborhood of Washington, D.C., three blocks … Read more
Woman Claims to Have Never Been Raped by Bill Cosby
‘These baseless charges are highly unlikely,’ says Bill Cosby historian NEW YORK — In a 1500-word op-ed published in the New York Times today, Jackie Stelnick, a New … Read more
Sarah Palin Hires Track Coach to Prepare for Presidential Run
Mavericky former half-term Alaska governor Sarah Palin preparing to run ‘a long way.’ WASILLA, Alaska – Maverick former half-term Alaska governor Sarah Palin, a one-time Republican vice-presidential nominee, … Read more
Perry Bad News for Rick
Former rodeo clown and perpetual presidential candidate Rick Perry faces up to 109 years in prison. Rick Perry, the real life cowboy and former Texas Governor, might want … Read more
AZ Citizenship Test: Pride and (a Generous Serving of) Prejudice
Genuine exam questions from Arizona’s new citizenship test Not long after being sworn-in, Arizona Republican Gov. Doug Douche signed a bill requiring the state’s high school students to … Read more
McConaughey to Wear Lance’s Pants
Lance Armstrong to be played by Matthew McConaughey Last year, during that infamous interview, Oprah randomly suggested that Academy Award-winner Matthew McConaughey ought to play Lance Armstrong on … Read more
Lost Journal: A Pain in the Neck Experiences Same
Journal entry: June 20, 2010 (age 41) – Pain in the Neck I have an intuitive sense I’m not intuitive. I have never seen Bigfoot, extraterrestrials, ghosts, or … Read more
Sarah Palin: A Poet Like No Other
Sarah Palin delivered a speech that made the Kardashian family sound eloquent. Sarah Palin, the former Republican vice presidential candidate and winner of Alaska’s Moose Calling Contest 2015, … Read more
The New Political Ice Age
Long term outlook: Expect increasing rhetoric with gusts of empty blather to result in virtual legislative permafrost, and a new political ice age. “And that’s it for sports.” … Read more
