My Conundrum: A New Job or a Trip to Australia?
WP_Post Object ( [ID] => 116070 [post_author] => 1349 [post_date] => 2024-02-11 07:14:49 [post_date_gmt] => 2024-02-11 15:14:49 [post_content] =>Typos or Koala Bears in Australia - what would you do?
In 1983 while living in Hawaii on my husband's 3 year tour, I finally got a part-time job as a proofreader for a magazine called "Hawaii Fishing News"! I worked there for just a month & then found out my husband's upcoming business trip was to be Australia & New Zealand & he asked me to go. I wasn't 1st Choice - but it was a nice thing to do! haha Sounds like a no-brainer but I was torn & not a quitter & after a bunch of false starts & freaky Island interviews, I didn't want to fish & cut bait! I'm sorry! On the other hand, I wasn't a happy flyer & since it was our last year in Paradise, the odds of me wanting to ever venture to Australia from the Far East - that's Baltimore - would be slim to none! It wasn't like this proofreading gig was the job of my dreams - under my belt the past 2 years I had written an Original TV Sit-Com with a Hawaiian theme, a Humorous Line Drawing Book & got an Agent! And, that isn't easy on the Islands - their offices are on a blanket in Waikiki - somewhere between Sand & More Sand! I know, I know - some of you forgot what it was like before cell phones & laptops! This Proofreading position should've been video taped - I was such a fish out of water! Are they kidding me - at home my Goldfish committed suicide! They took a look at me & thought - 'In 2 days it would be over anyhow! haha Yes, 'they' - there was more than one! To pick me - this Editor must've been hard up. I knew nothing about fishing - I was just there for the chum! Again, I'm sorry! I like it on a plate with lemon - not on a hook giving me stink-eye! And like I'm an authority on the spelling of Hawaiian words...Kamehameha, Kapiolani, Pupus! It's not a language - it's like Alphabet Soup for Dyslexics! Can I have a consonant, Vanna? And, the names of fish were different than the Mainland. Mahi-mahi, Opakapaka, Poke! For comfort, I had to go to McDonald's to get a Filet O'Fish & a Binky! But, I found out one thing. Fisherman really believe that size matters! And, fisherman's wives have to have a good sense of humor & a Lover on the side! Preferably one who likes sex in the morning & reads books with you by the fire - not to the Garage untangling fishing wire! As it turns out, I was pretty good at Proofreading - after a while, it's a lot like Pigs looking for Truffles! Never a dull magazine issue - Fishing Tournaments, Hukilaus, Moby's Dick Sightings! I came home every night seasick from all the Boat Tales & once was so loopy, I jumped in a Hot Tub & boiled some Shrimp at the same time! Well, I did go to Australia & New Zealand & brought back a Boomerang - I had to! It reminded me of the job I left behind - you know, 'Catch & Release'! Don't laugh, if I didn't go - I wouldn't have brought back a case of 'Scrotum Pouches'! They say the Kangaroo Scrotums are 'Unusual Sentimental Romantic Little Gifts'. Sentimental? Yeah, to Male Kangaroos! You can also read this article & so much more in my Memoir: "Owning the Stage, Renting the Balls: My Life as a Funny Girl!" [post_title] => My Conundrum: A New Job or a Trip to Australia? [post_excerpt] => [post_status] => publish [comment_status] => open [ping_status] => closed [post_password] => [post_name] => my-conundrum-a-new-job-or-a-trip-to-australia [to_ping] => [pinged] => [post_modified] => 2024-02-10 16:18:09 [post_modified_gmt] => 2024-02-11 00:18:09 [post_content_filtered] => [post_parent] => 0 [guid] => https://www.humortimes.com/?p=116070 [menu_order] => 0 [post_type] => post [post_mime_type] => [comment_count] => 0 [filter] => raw )
Typos or Koala Bears in Australia – what would you do? In 1983 while living in Hawaii on my husband’s 3 year tour, I finally got a part-time job … Read more