Ripping the Headlines Today, 8/13/24
Making fun of the headlines today, so you don’t have to The news, even that about Simone Biles, doesn’t need to be complicated or confusing; that’s what any … Read more
Olympics
Local Adult Baby Earns Spot on Olympic Whining Team
The adult baby had only one serious competitor, fellow Floridian Donald Trump, with his “Witch Hunt” routine. SARASOTA, FL — In the end, it was Stuart Walters’ floor … Read more
IOC Sued: Country Cites DEI and BOS Concerns
Dispatches from SNN (Slobovian News Network) Citing DEI and BOS worries, suit alleges the upcoming Olympics lack any sports based in Slobovian culture. SNN International Sports correspondent Shortte … Read more
Corporations Win Olympic Gold in ‘Downhill Ethical Backflip’
The collective ethical backflip has been quite impressive: from the high ethical bar of human rights into the pits of crass, unprincipled commercialism. By far the top team … Read more
Ripping the Headlines Today, 8/3/21
Making fun of the headlines today, so you don’t have to The news, even that about Rudy Giuliani’s dick pics, doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s … Read more
Japan Reveals Plans for Spectacular Additions to Olympics
Spectacular surprise additions considered for some events to make sure that records were broken. Olympic Committee Objects Japan was so disappointed with the limitations the pandemic placed on … Read more
Super Bowl LIII Update: Sneak Preview of NFL Official Sponsors
Memorandum: Super Bowl LIII – Consider a Wider Range of Official Suppliers Date: January 12, 2019 From: NFL Properties, Committee on Suppliers and Sponsors To: National Football League … Read more
A Few Predictions for 2018
Let us forecast a few of the fabulous events in store for 2018. Time for a few choice words for the not-so-dearly departed year of 2017. And those … Read more
Olympics Dealt a Blow by Pokémon Go
The new Pokémon Go smart phone app is jeopardizing one of the year’s biggest events — the Olympic Games. Unless you have been in a coma for the … Read more
‘Super Bacteria’ to Enter Rio Olympics: Could ‘Eliminate the Competition’
Analysts say that the population of super bacteria is so strong in the area, they could be the “last organisms standing,” taking the Gold in all watersport events. … Read more
