A Realists Guide to Goals and Whatever
Goals are fine, but let’s get real about them 1. Set goals. This is probably the most important part in achieving them. 2. If you suck at something, … Read more
satire
The Batty Battalion’s Lame Call on Lame Duck
Punditry declares Obama is already a lame duck, and may as well burrow deep and lie low You do realize that Washington, D.C. is not the real world, don’t … Read more
Man with Horrendous Halitosis Becomes Mayor of Lincoln, Nebraska
“Everything he says stinks,” say opponents of mayor with halitosis Jonathan D. Lumquist, known to have the most horrendous case of halitosis in public service history, has nevertheless … Read more
Cleveland Police Set Ariel Castro Free, Calling Him a Victim
‘Sure, we got the call about the kinky women with dog collars on,’ said police, ‘there are some wild ladies in Cleveland’ CLEVELAND, OH — Ariel Castro, who … Read more
Corporate Cowards Divert Shareholder Funds into “Dark Money”
Dark money strategy enabled by “Citizens United” Supreme Court decision If corporations are people, as the Supreme Court pretends, they certainly are loudmouths, constantly telling us how great … Read more
Study: 98% of Internet Users Admit ROFL Just an LOL
“We should have been suspicious from the very beginning,” says expert, regarding overuse of “ROFL” online A new study was released last week detailing various online practices of … Read more
Lost Journal: Kornheiser Removed from 7-year-old’s Enemies List (for Now)
Lost Journal entry: June 3, 2008 (age 39) A few weeks ago, I wrote a “Lost Journal” column about my 7-year-old nephew Tommy’s “Enemies List.” It explained that … Read more
Humor Times 22nd Anniversary Subscription Sale!
The more subscriptions you order, the more you save! The Humor Times is celebrating its 22nd Anniversary by making it easy to spread the laughter! Our Anniversary Subscription … Read more
Droning On: Paranoia Time
Got your tinfoil hat? It’s paranoia time in America again. Put on your tinfoil hats everybody. Or didn’t you get the memo? It’s paranoia time in America again. … Read more
Guide to Dealing with Roommates for Dummies
Dealing with Roommates There comes a time in everyone’s life when we must deal with that horrible reality of urban survival – having a roommate. Whether it be … Read more
